May is one of my busier months, not unlike January. It is the Paschal season, plus we have two birthdays, an anniversary, and Mother's Day, all in the first half of the month. By the time we get through all that, it's go-time for capstones x4, theater festival, and the push through to the end of the year.
I wasn't sure I was going to participate in Me-Made May this year (at least from a photo-taking standpoint), and I'm not sure it will last, but I got photos this week at least.
About what I wore: I was almost ready to let the red Remy go (lower left corner) because when I tried it on in March, it was uncomfortably tight, but it feels okay now. I'm glad to have it still. The sage Remy (upper left corner) that I barely blogged in the fall and wore exactly once because it made me feel dull is in the process of getting a facelift with embroidery. I wore it last Sunday when the front stitching was complete, and am now working on the sleeves. I'll do a proper post on it when I'm finished. I really love the beet linen ensemble (upper right corner) and am glad of the linen tops like this I made in the fall.
The weather is all over the place, as you can see by my clothes. I was on and off with tights all week although we've had a big rain in the last day that has cooled things down significantly. Small mercies.
I am struggling to feel okay in my body most days. Of the 15 pounds I gained in a week in January, only five or so has come off, and I would need to lose another 10 to get back to where I was maintaining a year ago. Peri-menopause is a B.
Part of me thinks I need to accept being in a bigger body, and part of me knows that I feel better psychologically and physically at the lower weight. I'm a bit angry that I can't eat a stable diet and maintain. I hate it that I feel more worthy in a smaller body but that I can't seem to maintain one without am even more restricted food life than I already have. I suppose the best I can do is to accept reality and move on (in bigger clothes).
So it goes, I guess. Bodies change.
