Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Chambray Dress of Shame

Enter: The Chambray Dress of Shame:


I know, I know.  It's a fine dress.  Attractive, even.  I made it last week during a fit of hating everything in my closet and feeling blue after the letdown of Pascha and the intensity of solo parenting during Bright Week.  (Making stuff when I feel like this is usually a bad idea, I've found).  I had found the fabric online and loved the embroidered border.  I know border prints are kind of the catnip of the sewing world, but they normally don't do much for me.  This one, however, really appealed to me, and I thought I could make it work with my Dottie Angel pattern.  


It does work, but I just don't like the dress on me.  The chambray is nice and soft, but the shade is just a little too...I don't know.  It kind of reminds me of a dress I wore in the mid-1990s.  And not really in a good way.  I want to like it, because the border is really pretty, but I just don't.  

I did have enough fabric left over to cut out a dress for one of the girls, so at least it isn't a total waste.  I think it will be super cute for one of them (probably Ponchik).


I even used one of my new labels in this dress!  I found them on a roll from an etsy seller and they are just what I've been looking for.  I don't have any interest in "building a brand" (don't get me started on the Commodification of Everything and Everyone), and I don't like putting my name in things (for a variety of reasons), but I did want a little something to say that I made it.  So this is perfect.  I might add them to some of my other me-made garments later this spring.

I find myself singularly without crafty inspiration right now (I seem to hit this point often around this time of year; must be something about April).  I don't really want to sew my summer stuff right now, and the weather is totally crazy so I'm in heavy sweaters and medium weight dresses with tights and boots one day and light lawn dresses with bare legs and ballet flats the next.  So it goes.  I do actually have enough stuff to start my summer rotation without making anything else, so I might just wait a few weeks before I tackle anything else for me.  I have a few more dresses to make, plus a blouse and a skirt, but it can all wait.  I do like to have some things to work on during the summer months.  I need to get out of the habit of feeling like everything needs to be finished by the first day of the next rotation--I find I enjoy making stuff for the rotation in the middle too.  I do have a couple of things for the girls cut out and waiting for sewing, but those shouldn't take long and don't require a lot of brain work on my part.

That's all for a cold and rainy Tuesday!



Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Reading & Watching: Despite the Falling Snow & Mastering the Art of Soviet Cooking

Christ is Risen!!  Happy Bright Week!  My kids are off school this week for spring break, so we are all trying to catch up after the craziness of Holy Week last week.  Because Annunciation (Old Calendar) fell on the Friday before Lazarus Saturday, we ended up with 12 straight days of services in the morning and evening, including the all-night Pascha service.  The kids did quite well, considering.  I was able to make a lot of the Holy Week services this year (many more than in previous years) and even got to direct the choir at a few of them!  (All three services were last minute, unprepped, and with a new-to-me choir, but it worked out in the end).

It being the Paschal season, I'm getting back to some shows and movies I'd put to the side for Lent. One is a movie that hit amazon shortly before Holy Week called Despite the Falling Snow.  I was really looking forward to it, as it featured 1950s-Soviet Union, spies, a mystery, and some British actors that I enjoy (Rebecca Ferguson of The White Queen and Sam Reid, a British character actor I happen to like).  It is based on a book of the same name (that I ordered before watching the show, but haven't received yet).  Both the book and the screenplay were written by the same author, Shamin Sharif, and the film was also directed by him.


The basic storyline is about a Soviet woman, Katya, who is working as an American spy in the mid-1950s.  She is run by another agent called Misha, who introduces her to a friend of his called Sasha (Alexander).  Sasha is in a government ministry that would provide good intel to the Americans, so Misha tasks Katya with getting to know him and stealing information from him.  She eventually falls for Sasha, and he for her, and they marry.  She decides on her wedding day to stop spying, and life goes on for a while. Then things fall apart, Katya disappears, and the rest of the story is devoted to figuring out what happened.  I won't say much more so I won't spoil the plot twists.

I was prepared to like this film a lot, given the subject matter and the actors involved, but I was somewhat disappointed in the end.  First is that the screenplay is a little clunky.  The story toggles between the 1950s and the 1990s, between the main characters of Katya (Rebecca Ferguson) and Alexander (Sam Reid) and an elderly Alexander (played by Charles Dance) and his niece Lauren (also played by Rebecca Ferguson, who struggled to get the American accent right).  The non-linear story telling that is now so common in films and shows doesn't really work well here.  The 1990s storyline seemed to have almost nothing to do with the 1950s storyline, and was really quite a distraction.  Artist Lauren is obsessed with finding out what happened to Katya, but we are never told why.  We are also given almost no information on Alexander (Sasha)'s life after Katya.

There were several subplots in the 1990s sections that really did nothing to advance the story or to flesh out the characters in any meaningful way.  The time spent on the early 1990s storyline could have been spent fleshing out Katya's character more, as well as her and Misha's back story.  I had a lot of questions about Katya and Sasha's relationship as well as some other minor characters that just weren't answered.  The big reveal at the end could have been accomplished without all the toggling back and forth.

Second is that the costumes in the 1990s sections were terrible.  I am old enough to remember 1992, and I don't remember anyone dressing like that then.  It's like the costume designer just didn't research the history, put the actors in modern (i.e. 2017) clothing and hair and said, "close enough."  I get that costume designers have to keep modern visual norms in mind, and that the designers are working with a visually uniform color palette, but there are ways to work around that and be true to the fashion of the time, as The Americans have amply demonstrated.  It was distracting.  The 1950s section was quite a bit better on the costumes, but I questioned whether the Soviets would have been dressed quite so well in the mid-1950s, after all the devastation of the war.  (Added to the fact that Soviets were famous for being less than fashion-forward by Western standards of the day).  Rebecca Ferguson's clothing is beautiful and the silhouettes are correct, but her wardrobe seems too pretty and nice for the time and circumstance.

Third is that the writer made a lot of mistakes about Russian/Soviet culture, life, and etiquette.  He doesn't seem to realize that the name Katya is actually a nickname and is short for Ekaterina (or Katharine in English).  No one would call her by her diminutive name if they didn't know her well, and she certainly would not have introduced herself to a new person (Alexander) as "Katya"; she would have said, I am Ekaterina + patronymic, in the same way that Alexander introduces himself to her.  Russians also would not have referred to her in conversation as "Katya" in the way that they do throughout the film; they would have said Ekaterina + patronymic (her father's name is never given in the film or credits, so I can't say what it would be).  Russian is much more formal than American English, and there are specific ways to address one another and much is dependent on how well you know the person and the relative ages of the people involved.  I also questioned whether Sasha (Alexander) would have been able to easily travel back to Russia in 1992, given his history.  (And the hotel where Sasha and Lauren stay is awfully nice by Soviet standards of the day; I've stayed in hotels from that time and they aren't that nice.  They aren't terrible, but they aren't that nice either).

So, the good.  The triangle between Katya, Misha, and Sasha was quite interesting to watch develop, and most of the 1950s sections of the film were interesting and engaging.  If you can set aside some of the cultural details I mentioned above, the sets were nicely done, and I enjoyed seeing the Moscow skyline again, as well as Red Square and the Kremlin (even if they were added later, as the film was made in Belgrade).  The physical places in the 1950s parts of the film felt real to me--the Soviet-ness of it came through.  I do wish that the story had developed some themes beyond the basic mystery of what happened to Katya.  I do wonder if this is one of those films that was poorly adapted from a good book; I'm eager to read the book and find out if it is better (at least one reviewer said it was).


Another series set in the same era (but hugely different subject matter) is The Red Queen; it is in Russian with subtitles on amazon, and very very good.  I've not finished the series yet, but I intend to get back to it soon.


I'm also reading Anya Von Bremzen's Mastering the Art of Soviet Cooking, which is part memoir and part social history and it is excellent.  I have a passage or two to share for Talking Tuesdays soon.  The book has re-whetted my appetite for reading about Soviet times.  (I'll probably get back to Figes' The Whisperers soon).  Von Bremzen's book is also strangely familiar, as there are quite a few foods and ways of eating that she describes that I remember well from my first sojourn in Russia in 1998.  The sosiski (similar to hot dogs) with canned, cold green peas and buckwheat kasha (for breakfast!), the farina with the tiny pat of butter, the kotleti (minced beef, breaded and fried), cabbage or apple pirozhki (yeasted bread hand pies), and pelmeni (meat dumplings in broth).  Tomatoes and cucumbers with smetana (a kind of sour cream) and dill.  Mayo on everything.  The mystery-meat-of-the-week soup in the stolovayas (public cafeterias) and the glasses of scalding hot tea that burned your fingers and you never drank to the bottom since the bottom third of the glass was loose leaves and sugar.  The strangely inefficient grocery stores and kiosks that never had change for a purchase.  I loved it all.

Friday, April 14, 2017

Thus Do You Fare, Lord Jesus?

I wrote the following poem my senior year in college to introduce an orchestral setting of J.S. Bach's "Thus Do You Fare Lord Jesus?" which is the musical theme of the St. Matthew Passion.  I had just started attending an Orthodox church (my first since returning from Russia in 1998) and was a serious inquirer, but not yet a catechumen.  I was received into the Church the following year.  The italicized portions are from the hymn O Love, How Deep, How Broad, How High, attributed to Thomas A'Kempis.

It seems fitting to share it today.


Thus Do You Fare

We are the ones for whom Jesus died.
We are the thief at His side.
O Love, how deep, how broad, how high...

We are Simon, carrying the cross,
We are Peter, weeping with his loss.
Shun not suffering, shame or loss--
help us Lord, to bear our cross.

We are the disciples who ran away,
We are the soldiers who pierced His side,
We are the darkening of the day,
We are the ones for whom Jesus died.
Ah, Holy Jesus, how you have offended...

We are the crowd who mocked and jeered.
"Crucify Him!" We rudely sneered.
We are Judas, betraying with a kiss,
30 pieces of silver our only list.
For us, to evil power betrayed, scourged
mocked in purple robe arrayed, 
He bore the shameful cross and death...

We are the the nails in His hands and feet,
We watched the soldiers as they beat,
We wept at the foot of the cross,
For ours was the infinite loss.
For us gave up His dying breath...

"It is Finished!" Hear Him cry.
"IT IS FINISHED!"
Jesus died for you and I.

~2 March 2000
Italics from the hymn, O Love How Deep, How Broad, How High, by Thomas A'Kempis

Monday, April 10, 2017

Foxglove and Holy Week plans

My sewing goal in March was to get through most of the stack of fabric I had set aside for the girls.  Most of it was for Birdie's summer wardrobe, but I had a few things that I was going to make for Ponchik as well.  I'm nearly through the stack (I have two more matching dresses to make for them for Ascension/Transfiguration and a surprise birthday dress for Ponchik, but otherwise, I'm done).

Yesterday was Palm Sunday, and the girls wore the matching dresses I made for the day.  (I will try to write a bit about the pattern soon because I like it)  They will work nicely for Pentecost as well, sans the black undershirts.  They ended up taking them off in the afternoon because it was so warm.  We went to Bridegroom Matins at one of the cathedrals in town and they had a nice Lenten meal afterward.  I'm pleased to report that I successfully ate Russian-style pierogi last night!!  I haven't had bread in more than two years because of all my swallowing woes, so this was a major treat for me.  I don't think I'll be eating sandwiches any time soon, but it was so nice to eat something I love so much (and makes me miss Russia!) and not have too much trouble with getting it down.  (I did make sure to have plenty to drink with it, and ate carefully with tiny bites).


And finally: the Foxglove Dress.  I nearly took this one out of my rotation (in fact, it was sitting in a pile until last night, when I decided to give it a shot and got out the steamer).  It was one of those "what was I thinking?" dresses.  I bought the fabric in February when I was wishing for something bright and cheerful.  I liked it when it arrived, but it washed up oddly--instead of softening nicely, it stayed kind of papery and stiff.  And oh, the static!!   


Every time I tried it on, it made me crazy.  I was disappointed a) because I was looking forward to having an orange dress in my spring rotation and b) because I've bought from Cloud 9 before and had a great experience.  My First Light dress remains a well-worn favorite of spring.  Cloud 9 fabric isn't exactly cheap either, so I was sorry to potentially lose the investment as well.  I washed it a second time and hung it to dry and hoped that would help some.  It did soften slightly, and most of the static has gone out of it, so I think it is okay.  I think the factory used a bit too much sizing on this particular bolt, so it will just take some more washing to get it nice and soft.


I also think I needed warmer weather to want to wear it.  I just couldn't get excited about a thinnish orange dress when I was shivering in my Uggs in early March.  But the next two days are supposed to hit 80, and it is quite pleasant this morning, so I think I'm going to say this one can stay in my closet. 


The fit is good, I think the color is decent on me (sunburned cheeks and lips from standing outside after church yesterday notwithstanding!) and I feel comfortable in it.  I even have on stockings today instead of full tights!  I can't believe the crazy weather we are having.  But that is spring around here, I've found--it is cold, it is warm, it is cold, it is cold some more, then it is warm, then cool, then it gets super hot and stays hot for the rest of the summer.


I like the print--it is interesting.  I think a taupe cardigan would look nice with this dress too.  I did have to pay attention when I was cutting to make sure the flowers were heading in the right direction.  I realized as I was laying out the pattern that it was a directional print!  Thank goodness for small mercies.


I'm leaving my sewing machine in the cabinet this week.  It is Holy Week, and we are in the middle of 12 days of morning-and-night services.  Since Old Calendar Annunciation fell on Friday (4/7), it added a few more days of services to the intensity that is Holy Week.  I'm also pretty tired right now and my last couple of makes have had some mishaps.  I was able to rescue them, but I think I need a break now.  I still have a few things to make for my summer, plus the girls' dresses, and I think it will be good for me to have those to look forward to after Bright Week.  I sometimes get a bit of letdown after big feasts, and I find it is helpful to have a project at the ready.

Image via
I plan to make Pashka on Saturday sometime (my recipe is very quick and doesn't require cooking or draining) and I'm considering making kulich for the first time this year.  I have two small soup-size cans saved and I want to make a half-recipe.  Kulich kind of scares me (even though I've made plenty of yeasted breads before), but I think I just need to do it.  A good friend gave me her tried and true recipe, so hopefully it will all turn out okay.

Just the facts:
Foxglove dress: Simplicity 1080 (redrafted), Cloud 9 foxglove fabric, tango vintage bias tape, elastic
Stockings: o-socks in navy from sock dreams
boots: KadiMaya from amazon
Cardigan: H&M
Earrings: etsy

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Talking Tuesday: Patience

Image via
Last week I read Vassilios Papavassilou's Meditations for Great Lent in a day (it is a small book) and found it quite edifying.  I wanted to share his thoughts on patience as one of the virtues we are trying to cultivate when we say the prayer of St. Ephraim during Lent:

O Lord and Master of my life:
Give me not a spirit of sloth, 
despair, lust of power and idle talking.

But give rather a spirit of purity, 
humility, patience, and love
to me, thy servant.

Yea, O Lord and King, 
grant me to see my own faults, 
and not to judge my brother, 
for blessed art Thou, 
unto ages of ages, 
Amen.

Fr. Papavassiolou considers the prayer in parts, and this is what he has to say about patience:

"But patience also means endurance.  The greatest form of patience, and its greatest test, is patience in the face of suffering--the ability to endure wrongs and afflictions patiently.  It is rooted in humility, for the humble man does not consider himself worthy of more than he receives.  Patience understands that the here and now is not the be-all and end-all.  That is why the humble man is patient with people.  He knows that the person before him is not the whole being, not the finished article--just as a good teacher is patient with his pupils because he sees their potential, and knows that their knowledge or abilities will grow in time and with patience and effort.  Patience is a truly divine virtue.  God Himself is patient, because He sees all ends and knows the outcome of all things.  The more we trust in God, the more patient we become."

~Vassilios Papavassilou, Meditations for Great Lent. Chesterton, IN: Ancient Faith Publishing, 2012, 63.

I found it helpful to think about things in this way, as I struggle a lot with perfectionism, both in myself and as applied to others.  A way for me to cultivate compassion (and by extension, patience) is to view the person before me as unfinished, a work in progress.